Almost 13 years ago, the public was awash with news of a young Aisha Nabukeera allegedly burnt by her stepmother. Then, she couldn’t stand the immense pain and the mere look at her deep wounds around the chest, hands and fingers.
Today, she smiles at her past life after beating all odds to overcome the emotional and physical violence inflicted onto her, writes YUDAYA NANGONZI.
When I first talked to Aisha Nabukeera about this interview, her quick response was a striking surprise. “It’s very fine. I am very strong now,” Nabukeera said, bursting into laughter.
“If it’s about violence and children, let’s meet and talk. I hope my story will inspire other survivors or children undergoing violent situations.”
I thought the interview would be punctuated with tears but my guess was wrong. “I have moved on. I have come to appreciate the scars on my body; no more crying, and I’m thankful to God for everything,” the 23-year-old says as she displays some of the scars on her fingers.
Nabukeera is now a bubbly, confident and soft-speaking young lady. And though her life story has been a sorrowful one, she narrates her journey with ease. While her heart has moved on, sad memories of the night of February 6, 2006 still vividly live with her.
“It was around 7pm when my stepmother sent me to buy paraffin for our tadooba lamp. When I came back, she gave me a new long-sleeved dress that stretched slightly below the knees to put on,” she recalls.
When Nabukeera interjected that the dress stinks of paraffin, the stepmother gave her a cold look.
“She just barked at me to put on the dress, nevertheless. She was a very tough woman,” she says in a low tone.
Later, she ordered her children to move out of the house, and Nabukeera to light the lamp. As soon as she lit the lamp with her right hand – which bears more deep scars to date – flames engulfed her.
The puzzled primary six girl screamed for help but no one came to her rescue until she found her way out of the house.
“As I headed for the well behind our house, a man dressed in an Arsenal jersey came and put out the fire. My stepmother later came with a bucket of water and poured it on me,” she recalls. Later, Nabukeera and her biological mother were abandoned in hospital by her father.
To her, this was the most traumatizing moment. She poses a question: “Have you ever been in a situation and you don’t know what to expect the next day?” She asks all those who are undergoing violent situations, to rethink whatever they do.
There was a point when her mother, Sophia Nakandi, attempted to poison herself and Nabukeera in hospital.
“She was so poor and had no money to pay for my medication. I know many children are going through the same and others have not yet recovered from violence but that’s not the end of the world. Your life is more important and you will make it,” she says.
TURNING POINTS
After two years of undergoing treatment in Masaka and later flown out of the country – thanks to businessman Frank Gashumba who mobilised the funding – Nabukeera was set to resume school again.
This time, she changed from Nyendo Public School in Masaka to City Parents School in Kampala where she completed primary seven in 2008. She says many people counseled her to accept her new looks, focus on her studies and look forward to the future.
“Sometimes, I would feel like being alone but Uncle Frank has always been there for me. He told me my scars shouldn’t determine my future. Today, I believe these scars are now a blessing in disguise,” she says.
Her resolve to resume school together with hard work caught the attention of the late Prof Lawrence Mukiibi who gave her a six-year scholarship; she joined senior one at St Lawrence School, Horizon campus in 2009.
Nabukeera says a positive attitude took center stage to win Gashumba’s heart and other well-wishers who offered her support. During her senior six vacation in 2014, Nabukeera disclosed to Gashumba that she wanted to try something she called “odd and new” by contesting in the Miss Uganda beauty pageant 2015/16.
“I was bored and wanted something to cheer me up. One time at home, I asked Sheila [Gashumba’s daughter] whether I would make it. I was worried that Ugandans would insult me, but she encouraged me to pick the forms and try my luck,” she says.
“I knew Miss Uganda usually has very pretty girls with nice bodies; however, I didn’t join to win, [but to] inspire other people like me who had lost hope.”
True, the insults at Nabukeera came through but that gave her the zeal to work hard. She made it into the top 21 girls headed for the boot camp before emerging among the top 10 at the grand finale; she also scooped an award for the Miss Rising Woman at the pageant.
During the boot camp, she says, the only difference with other contestants was the visible scars but she remained focused, looked elegant and perfected everything.
“If your body is deformed, it can be a turn-off to other people but it should be your strongest point. Use every opportunity before you to shame whoever makes you feel small,” she advises.
After the pageant, Nabukeera joined Uganda Christian University (UCU), Mukono in 2015 to pursue a Bachelor of Social Work and Social Administration.
AISHA NABUKEERA FOUNDATION
She preferred this course because her aim was to study anything related to engaging with communities.
“I am here because of people’s support. I owe a lot to Ugandans, the media and people abroad. Even those who didn’t know me helped me and I want to do the same,” she adds.
It was around this time that she started Aisha Nabukeera Foundation aimed at advocating children’s rights and assisting survivors. She kicked off activities with visiting schools and engaged in community awareness. However, at some point, she couldn’t juggle foundation activities and studies; she put the former on hold.
Graduating from UCU recently was another dream come true in her life.
“On graduation, I saw my mother cry. When my name was read, I screamed and proudly walked to the front. Some people thought I wouldn’t make it, but I thank God I made it. I was not favored in any way [because of the sad history] but worked hard to attain my degree.”
Her mother, who had thought of taking away their lives then, today believes she has a strong pillar in her life. “Whenever I visit her [Nabukeera stays at Gashumba’s home], she doesn’t believe how far we have come. She is a single mother and low-earning businesswoman who encourages me to work hard and take care of my five other siblings that were abandoned by my father,” she says.
As her search for a job continues, she is optimistic that employment will soon knock from one of the several NGOs where she has applied. Currently, she is mobilising funds to support her foundation.
RESPECT CHILDREN’S RIGHTS
In a bid to protect children’s rights, Nabukeera urges government to strengthen penalties on persons who violate their rights as well as sensitise communities. She says oftentimes when children’s rights are abused, responsible authorities don’t take serious action, which gives room to other perpetrators to violate their rights.
“In my case, my stepmother is still walking scot-free. Investigations were done and got stuck along the way. Uncle Frank tried his best to go back to court but in vain. When Kale Kayihura was inspector general of police, he ordered for reinvestigation but nothing materialized,” Nabukeera says.
She advises children to refrain from being tight-lipped whenever their rights are abused. If one fails to get assistance from their close relatives, they should talk to neighbours or nearby authorities. To parents, she calls for equal attention to their children, whether they live in polygamous or monogamous families.